Dating after 25 years of marriage
But contrary to what you might think, there are thousands of normal, healthy people online looking to meet someone great.” Elizabeth, 52, had been married for almost 25 years when her husband told her he’d met someone else.
“The two things I remember very clearly were that his face had gone that purple colour it went when he was feeling defensive, and the other was that I was so unbelievably stupid,” she says. I thought I had my life all mapped out and arranged – I thought I knew what my future looked like.” Three years on, she says, she barely remembers anything about the months after her husband left.
“I thought the recent strange behaviour and care with his phone was because he was planning a big surprise for our anniversary. “It was too complicated a set of feelings; the fury, the devastation, the rehashing of our lives together in the middle of the night, questioning every lovely moment we’d shared.
It was a blur, but I emerged eight months later a stone heavier and feeling like I needed to do something to move on.” So Elizabeth tried online dating and, while she says it certainly had its frustrating moments, after eight months she met Andrew, 51 and they are planning to move in together in time for Christmas.
A club to which I - a 45-year-old with a body battle-scarred by time and childbirth - thought my membership had expired.
You were married for many years and suddenly you find yourself divorced or widowed.
This is not how you had pictured your life turning out.
As a general rule, it usually takes one to three years for divorcees and three to five years for widows/widowers.
Each situation will be different depending on circumstances. The key is to understand that you are evolving as a person. That is different for everyone because every situation is different. As a general rule, don't date if you are still angry over a divorce.